Blog Archives
Five Things for Tuesday, December 22nd
1. I thought the Redskins would lose 30-3 against the Giants, so I wasn’t shocked by the 45-12 ass-kicking they took. The team is a pathetic mixture of overpriced free agents (DeAngelo Hall, Clinton Portis) and complete cast-off scrubs (Levi Jones, Stephon Heyer, Mike Williams, DeAngelo Hall) with a few actual skilled players left to go through the motions (London Fletcher, Jason Campbell, Andre Carter). It’s a bad season, the worst I can ever remember. One can only hope that this is rock bottom, and that next year we can at least earn our self-respect back.
Vinnie Cerrato Resigns
Holy shit. I haven’t been that excited by a sports headline since “Redskins Rehire Joe Gibbs.” Seriously. Wow. Dancing in the streets to commence.
Is it a sop to the fans? Sure. Is he being set up as the fall guy for Synder’s meddling? Absolutely. Do Redskins fans give a hit about that? Fuck no. Cerrato became the most reviled symbol of the lickspittle yes-man front office the ‘Skins have had in place since Gibbs left. So what does it mean going forward?
Five Things for Friday, 10/23
1. Have you ever really liked a song and enjoyed everything about it except one little thing that just starts to stand out to you every time you hear it? Then the more you hear it, the more time you spend dreading the part you don’t like? Eventually, you end up not liking the song nearly as much as you did and every time you hear it gets a little more disappointing? If no, then fuck off and read something else.
For my wife, one of those songs, I think, would be “China Girl” by David Bowie (and just now, the part she hates ran through her head and for a second she hates me just a little bit for bringing it up). For me, that song is “Paradise City” by Guns n Roses. The beginning of that song is like the perfectly distilled essence of what is good about rock music. The extended musical intro, the wailing refrain, simple and pure: “Take me down to Paradise City/ where the grass is green/ and the girls are pretty/Oh won’t you please take me home.” If for one song, I was blessed with the ability to play guitar, sing, and dominate a stage with my presence, it would absolutely be “Paradise City.” Except for one niggling thing.
What I Would Do If I Owned the Redskins
It’s been a season of utter dismay for the Redskins and their fans. Like many of us, I had some reasonably high hopes for this team going into the season. I thought we’d be able to compete in the division and for a playoff spot, especially since the Giants looked to regress without ‘Skins-killer Plaxico Burress, the Cowboys replacing T.O. with Roy Williams, which definitely appeared from last season to be a bad mistake, and the Eagles one year older and more brittle. I fully expected the ‘Skins to lose to the Giants in week 1 – Meadowlands is a damn tough place to play, especially early in the season, when defenses are naturally ahead of the offenses. Plus, Campbell and the young wide receivers had another year in the system. They looked good in the first half of the 3rd preseason game against the Patriots, in the one preseason game that “counts the most.” I fully expected to see a 5-1 team preparing to host the Eagles in a critical Monday Night game. Instead, well, the season happened.
Five Things for Monday, 10/19
1. The Redskins, as predicted, lost again, this time to the pathetic Chiefs. Watching the slow-motion disintegration of my team is just depressing. The quarterback is benched, and the backup has 30 seconds, down 6, for a miracle win. Instead, he just gets sacked in the end zone for a safety, game over. At least he didn’t draw out the suffering. The coach is relieved of his play-calling duties, which leaves him even more of a lame duck. Now what? I’ll tell you: a loss next week, in humiliating fashion, on prime-time Monday night. Are you ready for some football scrimmage practice embarrassment?
Short One for Friday, 10/16
I missed a non-weekend day of posting for the first time yesterday, grrrr. I will make this brief. I hate budget time. I am not too sure about my new boss. Chris Samuels will retire (I predict) and the Skins will end up around 5-11. It’s the weekend, and HOT DAMN.
Five Things for Monday, 10/12
1. The Redskins lost, of course, as I said they would. I’ve been correct every week so far if they would win or lose. Not sure that’s such a great thing. Having your team become a national laughingstock due to the owner’s clueless tactics, the head coach’s clueless coaching, and the players’ inability to get out of their own (as well as errant punts) way is particularly embarrassing and galling. Hail to the Redskins!
Five Things for Friday, 10/9
1. I can’t stand people who laugh incessantly at their own “jokes” or “funny” stories. They can’t even get the words out because they are SO FUNNY! Drives me right up the wall. Yes, I am talking about you, Kay.
2. In this rant, a non-Redskins fan calmly and clearly eviserated every shred of hope any Redskins fan might still be harboring under Dan Snyder. I don’t agree with everything, but he is dead on with so much of it. Much to my chagrin.
3. This made me laugh out loud this morning. Thank you, Onion.
4. Having an office door that one can close when co-workers annoy the shit out of you is a wonderful way so stop homocidal urges.
5. It’s Friday! WOOOOHOOOOOOO!
Winter in Derenemyn 