When we last saw our band of… whatever, they were all staring raptly at their last possible glimpse of DaleFace, trying to memorize every last unruly eyebrow hair and getting a good look at the Judgemaster General’s fillings before Daryl made his head explode by firing a high-powered revolver into his skull two feet away. Too bad they faded to black then, because I’d have loved to have seen the reaction of all of those people close enough to get hit by shards of flying bone and brains. “Dude, seriously, what the fuck! I was sitting on the guy! You couldn’t have waited like two seconds. God it got in my mouth!” That would’ve been cool.
This episode begins with Rick eulogizing the dead guy, something he’s starting to get a lot of practice at because he’s been doing a great job of keeping the group safe. Since he took over as Big Bossman, at least 7 members of the group have died (and probably some extras that didn’t get enough airtime to count). That’s close to a 50% loss ratio. He’s, uh, struggling in the role that he claims to have never asked for but sure as hell has gladly taken and run with, telling everyone what to do and making the decisions himself, at least until he changes his mind (Shoot the boy! Help the boy! Abandon the boy! Kill the boy! Keep the boy! Thank god someone else dealt with the boy!)
When last we saw the world’s most dysfunctional zombie apocalypse survivors, Rick had just blown away two guys from Philly for having the audacity to ask where the group was staying, Lori was suffering from brain damage before she actually suffered head trauma from a car accident, and some blond girl that hardly had any airtime at all before now was catatonic. Is this the week where our prayers our answered and Lori gets eaten, Carl tries to find her and gets eaten, Dale looks for the two of them and gets eaten, and the audience lives happily ever after?
Well, no, not so much. But I do have a confession to make. This episode didn’t make me angry. Not once. I know, right? Crazy. Well, OK, I did get angry once, but that was when they showed the car wreck from last episode, which is still just awful in every way. But other than that, I didn’t hate it. Did it have issues? A couple, but they were minor. Instead, we had a mostly plausible story, maybe for the first time since the first season. So put away your Haterade, pick up a gun, and follow along with our intrepid band of somewhat-less-stupid-than-normal survivors.
OK. I have to admit, I was a bit surprised by the turn of events from the mid-season finale (and when the hell did this trend start? I don’t remember shows doing this before. Is it just me, or did this crap just start happening a couple years ago? Or am I just dumb?). I fully expected more talky-talky and then Shane doing something reprehensible and getting his macho mug blown off. What we got instead was definitely more interesting.
It’s funny, because the last half of the show made me forget about the first half. I’m trying to remember what went on then. Much of it was pointless, of course, but that’s to be expected by now. Let’s see. Dale makes Glenn tell the group about the barn, because that’s how Dale operates. Instead of helping the kid out so that he can try to keep Maggie from melting down, Dale keeps his role as Group Cockblocker by not claiming he found out about the barn. Maggie, using her Female Telepathy that all women have, knows exactly what is going on from 150 yards away and gets pissed. Everyone in Glenn’s group gets all pissed off at the idea of zombies in the barn. In general, this episode is about being pissed off.
We’re almost there! Nearly caught up! I almost watched Episode 7 directly after Episode 6 last night, because for the first time in a while I was eager to see what was going to happen next. That’s a good sign. I decided to stick with the original plan I had, though, since if I watched more than one at once I was afraid that I get mixed up and that reviews for the earlier episodes would be colored by later ones. So, tonight I’ll watch Ep 7. I’m actually looking forward to it. Huh.
Which is odd, because it wasn’t like Episode 6 was awesome or anything. In fact, I find it hard to remember exactly what happened in a lot of it. The talky parts were pretty dull for the most part. I think what carried the episode for me was Shane, since Fuckin’ Daryl was reduced to a single glimpse of him in a tent. It also featured something that was awesomely realistic and true to life, which I appreciated since they didn’t have to do it.
The downside of this episode for me was once again Glenn (I finally saw how it’s really spelled! God I’m too lazy for this job.). He was asked last episode to keep a secret by two different people, including the girl who has been kind and desperate enough to bang him. But this week we learn that he is “without guile” and apparently even the thought of maybe having to lie to someone makes him uncomfortable and awkward and pained and moronic. So this guy has never been able to keep a secret, eh? I can picture him now: as a young teen, going to the dinner table, his father asking how his day was, and Glenn blurting, “I smacked off to the Sears catalog.” With his first girlfriend, who asks if her jeans make her look fat, “No, it’s all the French fries you eat that makes your ass so big and gross.” To a cop that pulls him over, “Yes, I know how fast I was going, and if you hadn’t pulled me over I’d have been doing at least 90.” I mean, OK, I get it, he’s supposed to be such a good guy that he can’t lie. So when Lori asked him the first fucking time to be discrete and he agreed, why didn’t he bring it up then? Does he not know that “discrete” pretty much means “keep your fucking mouth shut”? I think they overdid his truthiness thing in this episode to the degree that it became completely unbelievable.