NFL Week 6: Sometimes It Sucks To Be Right

This blow-up doll couldn't be more right.

First things first: the I’m Goin’ Deep Fan Club picture is gone for as long as Rex Grossman is no longer the starter for the Washington Redskins. Which means that it’ll probably not show up on here ever again.

Secondly, I realize that Week 6 isn’t over yet. There is still a Monday Night game to go. I don’t know who’s playing and don’t really give a shit since those games happen after I go to bed, and the entire NFC East played anyway. Plus, I need to get Week 6 out of my system quick, like a wasted college freshman after downing 6 bottles of Boone’s Farm. Best to purge and move on.

Anyway, this is what I said last week about the Redskins-Eagles game:

So this week coming up, the 3-1 Redskins face the reeling 1-4 Eagles in Washington. The Redskins have had 2 weeks to prepare for this game, get healthy and rested, study film, and prepare for this important NFC East game. Should be a win, right?

Ummmm, no.

Now, don’t accuse me of over-pessimism. I’ve been a self-aware Redskins fan for 36 years. I know how this shit goes. See, last year, the Redskins had a bye before their home game against the Eagles. They had a chance to make a statement game against the team they’d beaten once already that year. The Redskins were utterly humiliated on national TV, 59-28. The game wasn’t even as close as the score indicates. Yes, a 31-point win was actually less than it could have been.

See, the Redskins rarely win this game. Over the last 10 years, if there is an NFC East team that is reeling and the Redskins get an opportunity to bury them, they don’t. The Skins seem to always be the turnaround game, just like they always seem to lose to a struggling rookie quarterback and get them their first win (Bradford and Stafford in recent years). It’s just the way it seems to work. Do I want the Redskins to win? More than I can express. But I didn’t think they’d beat the Cowfuckers on Monday Night a couple weeks ago, and I don’t think they’ll beat the Eagles on Sunday. I want it too much. The Redskins CAN win this game – they can beat anyone. But they’re more used to beating themselves than anyone else, so I don’t see it happening. The Eagles have immense talent and can score in seconds from anywhere on the field. They are undisciplined as fuck, and sometimes that can destroy a disciplined team. I hope I’m wrong.

Well, sure enough, they didn’t. Win that is. They did a fantastic job of beating the shit out of themselves though. Sexy Rexy led the way with his 4 “fuck it, I can make that throw” interceptions, which ushered in the Jeff John Beck Era in D.C. The defense was flat in the first half, which led to the 20-0 hole, although they deserve credit for only giving up 2 TDs in the midst of a true Rex Grossman derp-fest. As I suspected, the Redskins’ ground game went nowhere (no team suddenly discovers the solution to their Achilles’ heel quite like a Redskins opponent) and they couldn’t overcome the deficit in talent. I hate the fucking Eagles, man.

The left side of the line went down early with injuries, that’s true, and that doesn’t help a ground game or protection. The fact that they even were in it at all is a small miracle, but I think that Mike Vick’s concussion (“dirt in his eyes” my ass) helped slow down the Eagles. The Eagles needed that game more than the Skins’ did, and the Redskins play like shit after a bye week, and Rex Grossman is Rex Grossman, and the competitive part of the season is over. They’ll still be 8-8, but they’re pretty much out of the playoff picture right now. That’s just the way it is. It’s cool. I still think they become a playoff team next year and an actual contender the year after.

  • The Cowboys lost, so there’s that. Unfortunately it was to the AFC Cowboys, the Patriots. Still, Vader killing the Emperor still counts a partial victory for the good guys.
  • They did some poll a couple of weeks ago that showed the Cowboys were the most popular franchise in the NFL. That says an awful lot about what’s wrong with America today.
  • The Giants beat the Bills, which isn’t a surprise, but would’ve been nice otherwise. That means the Redskins spent their last week in first place in the division this season. It was a nice couple of weeks.
  • Next week, the Skins play a rookie QB who has looked good but has struggled getting wins. Lucky for him, he’s playing the team that loves helping rookie QBs get their feet under them and get them early wins. It’s another coin toss game. I won’t be surprised either way.
  • I actually didn’t watch the much of the Eagles game. I was trying to finish my novel, The Storm of Northreach, and watching the first few series had my heart racing angrily. I switched to periodic score checking after that, and stopped bothering at 20-0. Which is good, since I typed THE END and also finished the Epilogue. It was a great feeling tempered by over-caffeination and lack of food, plus residual disappointment from the Skins game. Still, it was a better way to spend a Redskins loss.
  • Some other teams played on Sunday. Steelers Ravens Texans blah blah who gives a shit.
  • The Niners are apparently better than I thought they’d be. I have to give credit to their defense, which is full of serious beasts. Oh, and fuck you Carlos Rogers for figuring out how to catch a ball the second you leave the Redskins. Prick.
  • I don’t think they’re great though, just like the Lions aren’t great. But my pick of the Cardinals to win the NFC West is looking more foolish every week.
  • I wonder if the Ponder Era begins in Minny. I think it has to. Not much point trotting McNabb out anymore.
  • The Packers do what the Packers do, which is beat the teams they should.
  • WHO DAT? WHO DAT? WHO DAT THINK THEY GONNA BEAT DEM SAINTS? The correct answer: A mediocre-to-poor Bucs team which is somehow 4-2 and atop the Saints as the division lead. Nice 4th down pass there, Drew. I think there were more Bucs open in the corner of the end zone, maybe they would have liked the pick instead.
  • Mike Vick can die in a fire.


About Alan Edwards

Former cancer caregiver. Husband of the most magical and amazing person who ever lived.

Posted on October 17, 2011, in Football and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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